Confession: I am a serial MMORPG player.
I prefer the adrenaline rush that comes with watching the seconds tick down on a fresh game download, and with cruel precision I delete the games that had come from before and had failed me by not procuring my interest fast enough. I’ve roll bounced my way out of MMORPGS while chucking up the deuces far more times than I’ve ever seen one through to endgame.
My graveyard list of uninstalled MMORPGS is one of legend. Granted, I’m probably not alone. With the sheer quantity of MMORPGS available these days, bad eggs are far more prevalent than good ones. So it’s pretty easy to see why most gamers range from cynical to outright pessimistic when it comes to even considering giving most new MMOs a chance. From the casual to the hardcore, we all have those knee jerk reactions that make us solemnly regret signing over our e-mail addresses to a lifetime of game spam because we got a little to eager to play that new so and so. Of course I have over 20 e-mail address (thank you yahoo), which are all fodder for my various gaming urges so I don’t exactly apply . Regardless, here are five things that without a doubt, will make me drop an MMO faster than an ant covered cheesecake.
1. Carbon Copies
Oh yes, do tell! Another fantasy based world complete with races and flashy armor? There are orcs, and elves and dragons you say? Oh goodness I’m the savior of the known world? Oh my how wondrous! I honestly haven’t heard/played/seen that one before. It’s not that I’m against fantasy mind you, but the constant rehashing of that same old concept definitely means its time for a few new ideas.
The name of the game here folks is novelty–what does your game have that the other 4673845 games I’ve played before did not? Oh you know, besides my attention?
2. Non-consensual PVP/Open World PVP
Don’t I deal with enough insane sociopaths in my daily life? I don’t really want to spend too much time paranoid because every other player is out to corner me in a back alley, skill me into oblivion and then river dance all over my looted corpse thank you very much. Granted, there are many players who wouldn’t be bothered by this but I am not one of them. And considering all the work I put into a character, the sheer force of my rage would compel me to rise from the ashes of my fallen soldier long enough to rob you of everything you know and love. So for the sake of the world at large, let’s just not and say we did.
3. Straight up Ridiculousness
If the most powerful armor for my class consists of stilettos and g-strings, I’ll just go ahead and show myself out. I don’t know about you, but if I were the one fighting a scantily clad female and had an opening for a crotch shot, I would probably take it. Or at least leave a tip.
4. Grind Based Gameplay
You mean to tell me I have to kill 30 MORE Feral Wolves just to bring you 10 damn pelts?!? I’m sorry sir what are YOU doing today, besides wasting my time and putting my life in danger?
5. Lack Of Character Customization
Seriously? I can’t even change my skin color or features? Oh you just think all of us gamers are white males don’t you? Excuse me while I give you the side eye of judgement.
Of course this list could go on and on, but these are just my top five. What about you my fellow gamers? What are your MMO/MMORPG deal breakers?
Published: Aug 16, 2013 03:02 pm